I was subbing for senior English at the
high school. I am not always sure where my inspiration comes from
(perhaps too many caffeinated beverages), but this particular day, I
was in the zone (you can decide if that is a good thing). I started
my final class of the day with, “Hello, my name is Mr. Miller.
Welcome to Hell” (completely stern face), then I cracked a smile
and the whole class broke out in laughter. I handed out the
assignment, which was a 50 question worksheet with questions about
William Shakespeare. After awhile, students started asking me for
answers to some of the questions they were having trouble with, and
instead of just telling them that I was not allowed to give them the
answers, I made up really absurd answers and announced them to the
class. One question was, who was the greatest script writer of
Shakespeare's day, and I told the class it was Walt Disney. I also
announced to the class the answer to number 50, What is Iambic
Pentameter? “A rare flesh eating disease.” I thought I was
hilarious and then I realized that a number of the slacker students were writing down each thing I said as their answer. I
decided not to let them in on the joke and have their teacher fill
them in when he returned.
Quote of the day from today: “Wow Mr.
Miller, you know everything!” - delusional 2nd grader
Question of the Day:
What was the craziest thing a teacher
ever did in one of your classes growing up?
My freshman or sophmore year of high school I was taking European History with Snow White reincarnate. No Joke, if Snow White were alive today, she would look and act like my History Teacher. Now, one thing our class quickly learned is how my teacher HATED Fidel Castro. I'd like to describe her feeling towards Fidel: It was as if every bit of ill feeling she had ever had towards anyone, she had simply redirected it towards Fidel instead. Because of this obvious loathing, I began to leave little notes from Fidel on the board when my teacher wasn't looking. "Fidel was here" "Fidel loves you" Little things like that. She would get so upset every time she saw these notes and mutter angrily to herself as she erased them. Some time after this, we had a test and she told the class that the answer to #23 was not Fidel Castro and that we should not circle him as the answer. Why she even put him as an option is beyond me. So naturally, the class clown had to add to the abuse. We are all busy taking our tests and he says, not softly, "Fiiiddeeell Ccaassttroo" and makes a large circle motion with his hand. My teach gets up from her desk (remember, Snow White) stomps over to his desk (which happened to be right next to mine) rips his paper our from under his hand, looks at it, throws it to the ground and STOMPS on it. I decided that I had accomplished every students dream of driving their teacher insane. I never saw anything near that kind of aggression before or after that incident from my teacher. Needless to say, the love notes from Fidel become nonexistent after this event.
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